why do I ALWAYS have to be the strong one?
why cant you ever just be here for me? JUST ONE TIME KEL!!! why can't you ever just figure out that maybe I need you and you need to be here for me. You actually need to drop everything in your life for just a few fucking hours and just be here for me. ya know? Just the way I have ALWAYS been there for you. the way I have dropped everything to be with you and be there for you in your hardest moments. DO NOT tell me to just stick it out and I'll be home soon. I dont want to be anywhere near a hundred miles from you right now. I CANNOT BELIEVE that you can't even fucking drive up here. That in all those times I said I needed you that you could be here even ONE TIME! Christ Kel. Where were you when I tried to kill myself this summer? Where were you when I took so many pills I slept through a whole shift? Where were you all those night I had to cry myself to sleep while you were off having some great fucking summer with Jerry? and now, I know when Derek breaks your fucking heart I WILL be there to help pick up the fucking pieces and I WILL be there when you say you need me and you feel like dying and all you want to do is curl up into a ball and die. I will fucking be there for you. Even though you were never here for me.l