could you leave me with a scar

I knew I deserved better. I knew I could go farther and I knew it wouldn't last forever.

I tried to change, and I did. I changed and I conformed into what I thought you wanted. And I would have stayed that way because I loved you, and because I thought you knew better. But I don't have to change for him. I can be me and he loves me for all of my flaws. For all of my scars and stupid quirks that would cause so many problems, he loves me. And I wouldn't have been able to let him love me a year ago. I didn't let him love me a year ago. But he waited. And now I'm stronger and weaker all at the same time. I'm strong in who I am but I'm still a weak heart. I still love so easily and care so much and love so deeply, but I'm so damn happy.

You know that feeling when you turn over in the middle of the night and feel the cold crinkle of the fresh sheets on your bed as you stretch your legs and breathe in real deep the sent of midnight air? That's what he feels like. Like new beginnings and yet familiar soil. Like a fresh blossomed field of lavender.

I think I realized just in time,
about my old self was hard to find.
You can bathe me in your finest wine but I'll never give you mine.
'Cos I'm a little bit tired of fearing that
I'll be the bad fruit nobody buys,
Tell me, did you think we'd all dream the same?

And doesn't that sound familiar?
Doesn't that hit too close to home?
Doesn't that make you shiver;
the way things could have gone?
And doesn't it feel peculiar
that everyone wants a little more?
so that I do remember to never go that far,
Could you leave me with a scar?