I have written about this before but it's also totally new. It's about places that hold memories. Places that hold feelings. Places that hold doubt and stress; hope and loss, death and life. These places are bound to me in inexplicable ways yet, I wonder is it possible to ever let those places go? Maybe not the ones that hold your own memories, but perhaps feelings that you associate with those places. I go by this place at least once a week, and at first it was a place of beauty. A place that held secrets from the world, and kept it deep within its shadowed stone, but now it is associated with something cruel and loveless. It is loss that I have come to associate this place with, betrayal and distrust. But lately as I pass this place all I feel is the emptiness it holds. All that I know of this place is dissolving away as the winter cold washes over all of the secrets and carries them back out into the world where they can be shared with someone more in need of them and where I no longer have to feel the emotions that it hides. This is why I wonder if places although holders of memories, have the ability to release the feelings associated them...because if they do, I wonder if stone can release all that it holds onto, If I can do the same.

She who was lost has not been found, but has indeed found a light at the end of the tunnel of dread. Receiving what she wished she needed was the final straw not to break her but to set her free. It is true that in searching for one's self, we look to everyone but the inside of our own hearts. No one can save you but yourself. She was no different. Finally...after all of the dark days and lost hours, she retrieved what had truely been lost. It was not the relationship in which she dreamed would brng about a change in her world, but it was the lost person hiding within her very own soul. Without it happiness would never truely have been possible; not that she had understood that until the dreams had slowly revieled what truely lie beneath. Dangerous was her trek, and many a time it was given up, but only a loved soul could have survived it. I guess I never realized how much I was lost before I was found, and found by no one but myself. But I also have never felt so loved even when I was blind to love and only looked upon hate and excuse. Interesting how things have a way of working themselves out right when you actually need them to.

Elle

So lost. Need air. Need to breathe. What's wrong. I'm scared. She's gone. Lying in Despair. Drowning slowly. Quickens fast. Sink lower. Deep within. Cant get out. Need to breath. So lost. Need someone. Anyone. Her. Back.